Anonymous asked: soo I sent you a valentine's day e-card but it says you still didn't view it.. type in tumblrlinks[dót]cóm/?derekzane69 then sign up as ''derekzane69'' and view premium inbox
Aww, man! I’m always missing those damn e-cards. It’s okay though because yesterday I checked my mail and I had a belated valentine’s day card from my dentist telling me that I should stop by. So I did, but she didn’t seem very happy to see me. She said something about not knowing how I found her home and said she wasn’t even really my dentist (which is good because I hate starting relationships with people I have business relationships with) and told me I should go. I think I must have caught her at an awkward time because she was in a robe and looked like she had been sleeping, which is weird because it was only 12:45am and I haven’t gone to bed that early since junior high. Anyway, I tried to go by again tonight but there must have been a robbery or something because there was a police car outside her house. I mean, it didn’t have it’s lights on or anything, but the cop was giving me some dirty looks, so I guess I looked like the robber. I decided it was probably best if I just wait a few days and then sneak in through her back door to keep from disturbing anyone.
I appreciate the sentiment though (and I’m guessing by adding the “69” to my username that you are interested in sexual relations with me), but I’m afraid I’m not going to be able to make anything of this relationship seeing as 1) I’m starting this thing with my former dentist and I think it has potential and 2) I’m not really interested in grey people without any facial features. But if you’re looking for someone, I might suggest going down to your local police station and looking at the “wanted” posters. Those people are always interesting.
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